Sometimes, I think the radio is talking to me. And, no, not in a creepy I might be a schizophrenic and the voices tell me to "burn it down" kind of way, but rather, there are days when I think that the radio was meant just for me. An example: if N'Sync, Chicago, Don Henley, and Kelly Clarkson are all played in the same hour. Well, today is one of those days that I think newspapers and other media outlets were designed just for me. Why? you say. Well, gofugyourself.com did one of their Britney Spears monologues, which I love, The Washington Post syle section had a feature article devoted to Maury Povich and his paternity tests (5 online pages of amazing insight alluding to some of my favorite bed-hoppers), and USA Today had a big story on Hugh Laurie. I've probably read more "news" today than I have in the past year. And, it inspired me. I apologize if this is overly graphic for some, but from now on, I'm only talking to Hugh Laurie. (Because I know he reads my posts...And, again, I swear I'm not schizophrenic.) Dearest Hugh, Hi, it's me again. I hope you're doing well. I thought about you all weekend. Again. I guess you didn't have time to call, but I know that you're pretty busy with the show and all. Even though you've been on hiatus for weeks because of that stupid "American Idol," (don't worry, I've been working very hard to make sure everyone knows you're still the hottest British guy on Fox. That Simon Cowell has nothing on you. You're much better at the razor sharp wit in addition to those gorgeous blue eyes) I'm sure you've been busy with other projects. But, when you can, call me, ok? Anyway, I read the article about you in USA Today today. (That's weird. I wonder how you can write that without repeating the word "today." Funny, huh? Actually, I guess that's not really funny. Or, at least, not funny like you're funny...I so don't deserve you, but call me anyway, ok?) Of course, this shouldn't be surprising because I read everything about you, even that old press you did from "Stuart Little 2" that takes forever to find on the internet, but I do. I find it, and I read it. I'm that dedicated. Anyway, there were a few sentences in the interview that were my absolute favorite. They read, "Actually, all this venom and victory over death has added up to a mushrooming hit for Fox...It also has brought laurels to Laurie..." Well, I read that, and I thought "OMG!" I mean, I know they meant it to be a metaphor and everything, but it has to be kismet! Like, without the Fox network airing "House," I never would have found you, and I'm a Laurel, because that's like my name. I mean, it's isn't "like" my name because it is my name, but anyway..."House" brought me, Laurel, to you, Hugh Laurie. (It's just says Laurie in the quote, but it's reffering to all of you. And, omg, I just realized how alike our names are. That must be more fate. If we got married, I would be Laurel Laurie, which people would think was made up, but I would say "No, it's real," and then you'd walk up behind me at the resort where we're staying in the British Virgin Islands, because you and the islands are British, with our kids, a twin boy and girl named Lawrence and Lenore, because once you've started with Ls, it's hard to stop, and people would recognize you because you're famous and get all giddy and then they'd know why my name was that, and we'd all laugh before the strangers went away because they didn't want to bother big, important you anymore, and then we'd make out...) Truly, the show "House" has brought at least one Laurel to you, Hugh. So, call me, ok? I miss you. Call me, Laurel (your pumpkin, or, at least, that's what you'd call me if we ever met and did fall in love, which would of course happen, as soon as we met)