Work is Good

Well, what I learned yesterday is that even though I thought I had reached a truly frightening point in my daytime existence (please reference previous post about involvement in soap plot lines and affection for syndicated game shows), I wasn't anywhere close to rock bottom. Sometime yesterday afternoon (probably in the lull between "One Life to Live" and "General Hospital"), I went outside. Now, I'm not sure where to begin painting this scene, so bear with me as the details unfold... I went outside because I wanted to put some pumpkins I had recently carved on the stoop for everyone to enjoy so we could all embrace the holiday spirit. (I don't know when I became fifty on the inside, but it happened. Also, as a little tidbit, I am freakishly good at carving pumpkins, so I tend to spend way too much time doing it in the month of October. I don't do faces. I tend to have huge spiders in their webs, skeletons, bats leaving a haunted house, etc. And, to defend myself, I can't play sports and I'm tone deaf so I don't run, throw/catch balls, or sing. Some people get to shine on the soccer field or inside a karaoke bar. I have pumpkins. Just let me be.) I was also wearing a green velour track suit because I haven't done my laundry in awhile, so there's the uni-color faux sport-style dressing to consider. And, I had Cassidy with me, and she goes off her leash in the yard in front of my apartment building, so she was running around me in circles (dressed in her own Halloween-themed hooded sweatshirt from Target) while I decided the best way to arrange my pumpkins. And, of course, this would also be the moment when my downstairs neighbors returned from their lunch, and I had to let them know that their dog had somehow gotten out of their apartment over the weekend. (After we all looked at my handiwork, naturally.) Could I have looked and/or sounded more like the neighborhood busybody with nothing better to do with her days? As I discussed with a friend of mine, I'm actually kind of hoping they think I'm an unwed mother so at least all of my idle day time and disconnect from reality could be blamed on a baby. If I start talking about starting a Neighborhood Watch anytime soon, I want someone to intervene. I promise that it will be for my own good.